BUILDERmarketingIDEAS

1. Thank you for paying 3x the market value for your home. Build the same home with us today for a 25% premium and save 15% (when compared to what tomorrow’s offer will be).  We’re a partner you can trust in!
2. Please sign your change order to confirm that you DO NOT want the change implemented. Otherwise, we will assume that you want the upgrade and will proceed without notice. Thank you for your business!
3. Since you accepted the last change order, we will save you the trouble of generating change orders from now on and will just bill your credit card as new features become available. We’re fun and easy to do business with!
4. In order to ensure your privacy, you will be required to provide your full name, home address, social security number, credit card number, secret password and mother’s maiden name to an overseas outsourced call center so that we may ensure that you really DON’T WANT the change order that we’ve automatically generated for you. We’re looking out for you and your family!
5. We’re sorry that you’ve decided to build with someone else. If we were to match the price of the competitor and refund the money you spent with them (even though we tried charging you 3x more), would you consider building with us? What if today only, I took an extra 50% off? Our business model rules!
6. In order to confirm you are who you say you are, I’ll have to email you the Change Order Confirmation Code…or is that Non-Confirmation Code? Oh well, what’s it matter, I’ll forget about you the second I pick up my next call… If you do not contact us by PHONE within 20 minutes and read the code back to us, we’ll assume that the REAL YOU really wants the the Change Order implemented and the person on the phone is just a crank with nothing better to do. Because we care about our customers…
7. Before you go, can I tell you about a great special offer we have? Get a great new basement finish for just $95 per square foot…how about $45?  What if I made it $25?  We’re here for you!
8. Dear Important Customer, Congratulations! We’re sorry you’re building with someone else but you are now registered to receive endless emails with special offers and exclusive inside content.  To unsubscribe, please call our Customer Care Center between 10 AM and 2 PM, Calcutta time to ensure that you really want to be removed from our email list. Who trusts technology when there are people here to serve your need!
9. We know that our computer system called you 15 times on a Saturday to remind you to renew your contract which is due in 60 days but we didn’t want you to miss out on paying 3x more than you had to.  A trusted friend for your business….

May I say that register.com sucks on many different levels?  I may have exaggerated a bit….but not too much.